Monday, August 3, 2015

Struggling and Exciting Times

My mind travels away from me most days; thinking, longing, desiring...more.  I have a hard time connecting with people that don't have any long-term goals or plans in their lives.  I can empathize with people in their life, but sympathy is not always something that I can share with others.

I have cravings for the life that I grew up with, in a way.  The way my Grandfather was always there for me, always there with me, whether thousands of miles separated us, we were both incredibly close.  He instilled in me a value of working hard, that you aren't entitled to anything, you have to work hard for it and then some.

I apply this rationale to my work and family life, personally, but I realized I don't with close relationships.  I have put that 5/6th on my list of to do list.  As a result, I have some improvements that I need to do there.  Some of the things I miss a lot are holding hands, the calmness that you feel laying next to someone during a cold night, the dorky faces made whilst walking around town, all of those socially acceptable experiences.

I tend to get in my own way and am awkward with people.  Though, if you think about it, we all kind of are.  We all either get in our own ways, or well, we fix it, change course.  I can either ignore people, or I could actually put some effort into this part of my life that I've completely and utterly shut down.

New adventures this week as I'll be going on vacation to explore a city I haven't had the pleasure to spend enough time in.  I'm incredibly excited!  I love the pacific northwest.  I've always loved driving through and stopping.  Just need to pack my bags today/tomorrow and then I'm off for some new adventures.

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